Happy Mother's Day! Never one for chintzy gifts, I opt to give my mother something a little more personal on this special day - poetry. While the final product is anything but award winning, it's my favorite way to say thank you for another year of support and love. So here you have it Mom. I love you!
For so many years I have cursed my genes,
For boobs that need lift by artificial means,
The neurotic streak and the Texas wide hips,
And white skin more blinding than a solar eclipse.
But her physical legacy is only just the start,
For my mother is the one who has given me my heart.
On endless cross-country trips she was the best backseat driver,
With a toiletries tool kit that would envy Macgyver,
She showed me how to travel in style - even at a campground,
And looks like a queen even when no one else is around,
These days she’s captain of her own “BREEZY1”,
The driver’s seat from which my father is shun(ed).
She understands the importance of a good education,
And for that reason she’s in school administration,
After so many years teaching she can’t simply let it go,
When at the chalkboard or reading chair she puts on quite a show,
And even though I’m way better at playing Five Crowns,
She still taught me the difference between verbs and nouns.
She passed on her grace, articulation, and gratitude,
But perhaps best of all she gave me her attitude,
Because on the worst of days she’s still able to smile,
And make it though tough situations with style,
She’s a like a straight Ellen or a fierce Beyonce,
(Even though she got the boot in ballet).
So this mother’s day I want everyone to know,
I have the best mother in the land, although,
She may have given me a crooked chin,
We’ve had more adventures than Huckleberry Finn,
And don’t think for a minute that I don’t see,
How lucky I am to have so much of my mom in me.