Gratitude

Photo found here.

I have been feeling really grateful lately and it reminds me of that old song about falling asleep counting your blessings instead of sheep.  Now whether that song makes you smile or cringe there’s one thing that remains true for all of us – being grateful and recognizing the good in our lives does wonders for our mental and physical health.

That’s right, being grateful does not only improve our mood and outlook on the world, but it can help us to decrease our stress levels. This second part is especially important because stress wreaks total havoc on our physical health; I’m talking everything from chronic headaches to a wimpy immune system, troubles in the bathroom to sleep problems and more. You can learn more about the affects of stress as well as ways to combat it here.

So what does being grateful have to do with all this?  Well, when we experience and express gratitude we are recognizing the things that are going well in our lives. This helps us to keep a healthy level of optimism and can be really beneficial when unexpected challenges arise. When we take the time to reflect on what we’re grateful it’s much easier to believe that good things will continue to happen in our lives. It is also a great way to put the daily stressors of life back into perspective.

What are you grateful for today? What's making your toes scrunch with delight? Who's got your heart smiling so wide it's ready to burst? Make a list and begin to recognize how many things you have to get excited, contented, elated, relaxed, and enlivened about. Keep it in your pocket for a week or post it on the fridge to remind you what's going well. 

Your list is also a wonderful way to make sure you are letting other people know you appreciate what they do. If you wrote down that you are thankful for your mama, make sure you let her know it! Maybe you are glad you discovered a website that has helped you personally or professionally - go ahead and jot an email to the creator and let them know how much their work means to you.  Think of this as gratitude karma. When you let others know that you are grateful for them, they are more likely to keep up their efforts... when they keep up their efforts, they continue to share their fabulous self with others... Conversely, you can become the recipient of another's fabulousness because someone else encouraged their efforts.  

So what has my heart thumping this week? Tune in tomorrow to find out!

Inspiration in Gold

Photo from Martha Stewart Living 

I wound up at the gym during rush hour today; not a treadmill or elliptical machine without a sweaty operator in sight. Yet somehow I scored a major find at the magazine rack - an April issue of Martha Stewart Living! Okay, I may not be a huge Martha fan - her style tends to be a little too Stepford Wife for me - but when the alternatives are a December issue of Star or a copy of Science Times that's missing 13 pages out of the middle... well you'd pick Martha too.

My favorite piece in the magazine was a profile of Susan Lyne's Manhattan apartment. The golden tones are so warm and inviting and set the stage for an updated take on the antique furniture Lyne's inherited. I also love the look of  the monotone artwork in mismatched frames, it gives the whole theme a less stuffy feel. 

Photo from Martha Stewart Living

Photo from Martha Stewart Living

Photo from Martha Stewart Living

Summer Dreaming

"Feel those shoes, Mr. Sanderson, feel how fast they'd take me? All those springs inside? Feel all the running inside? Feel how they kind of grab hold and can't let you alone and don't like you just standing there?" - Ray Bradbury

I love this quote from one of my all time favorite books, Dandelion Wine by Ray Bradbury.  It's one of only a few books I have read more than once and the only book I can thumb open to any page, start reading, and be absolutely delighted with the result. This part of the book in particular gets me in the summer mindset and feeling like a child in the best sense... taking me back to the days when a new pair of sneakers meant a new world of possibilities and adventure. With only two more days of class and one day of finals to go, my mind is definitely on summer lately. 

Please pardon if my postings become sporadic over the next week; I'll be back in full force as soon as my classes wrap up for good.

Cute boot

Boots by Chooka found on What a Pair

It's a rainy Monday and even though I've been inside all evening with laundry, emails, and cleaning, if I had a reason to be out these would be the boots to do it in. I love the color combination and the print would definitely brighten up even the gloomiest downpour. For now, however, it's a few more hours of work before I escape to the cozy confines of my mattress... no boots involved.

Creating Happiness

Photo via TheSweetLife

Realigning Our Actions

An exercise in rediscovering happiness

Part 2

Today’s post is the third and final installment in a brief series on finding your happiness. If you’re confused, just skip back a post or two to get caught up on the latest!

Having brainstormed and analyzed a previous period (or two) of happiness, it’s time to… well… brainstorm again. This time, you’re going to think about ways to create the circumstances for achieving more happiness in your life.  Now that you have identified what sensations and feelings constitute your own unique version of happiness, you can begin to think about new ways to create those same emotions.

Let’s follow up on a few examples we started last time to illustrate this process.

Pulling from my own happiness exercise, I shared that during a previous period of happiness I was interacting with interesting people who brought new perspectives to my life everyday. So what are a few ways I can reintroduce that dynamic back into my daily living now? Well since I enjoy discussion I could join a current affairs book club, or perhaps a group centered around a personal interest such as a monthly meetup for people to discuss ecological living.

What about our example of the individual who missed their significant other because that relationship represented a sense of purpose and love? There are other ways to rediscover a sense of purpose and love without finding the next Mr. or Mrs. Right. Volunteering is a great way to reestablish a personal sense of purpose, especially volunteering that enables us to take care of another being such as walking dogs or taking care of the cats at a local no kill animal shelter.  If having a personal connection is what you miss, maybe volunteering at an assisted living home or tutoring children at a local school is more up your alley.

Finally, there is the individual who looked back longingly on their co-ed days because of the sense of belonging and adventure that period of their life represented.  Another way to develop a close sense of unity with a group is to join a team that appeals to you. Many people find taking part in an amateur sports league is a great way to reestablish a personal sense of belonging, but do not feel limited if you would rather hide in the locker room than spend time on the court/field/green/ice/what-have-you. There are endless types of teams to join, from debate to art to board games to improv, which are great ways to bond with others on a deeper level than just being social. Of course, if it’s the adventure factor you’re missing, it’s time to start planning. Find a friend who is ready to try something crazy or strike out on your own. Sky diving? Road trip? Dog sledding camp? Create your own adventure to start, and adventure will start to find you.

I hope you have found this exercise to be helpful. Of course, happiness is a tricky thing and we each experience it in a different way. However, I think that we can all benefit from examining our current levels of satisfaction and considering what might help increase that level. Do not fall into the trap of thinking “If only I had more friends” or “I just need a spouse to be happy”. Happiness doesn’t do titles like this anyway. By digging a little deeper and recognizing what it is we’re really missing, we can begin to find new ways to fill that void. 

Happiness Brainstorm

Photo via ehow

Realigning Our Actions
An exercise in rediscovering happiness
Part 1

I think many of us fall victim to the distorted thinking I described in my previous post.  We do things we think will make us happy in the long run, but instead make ourselves miserable in the process.  So instead, let us take a cue from what has worked in the past. 

Think about the last time you felt truly happy in your life.  Not just for a day or moment in time, but a period in your life when you felt happy and fulfilled.  Now, start making a list of all the elements of your life during that period – both big and small.  Do not self-sensor; focus on being open to all of the sensations, memories, and nuances that come to mind. Your list may seem abstract or not make sense to anyone else – this is when you know you are doing it right. The more specific you can be the better. Part of you list might look something like this:

• Fresh air
  
• Walks up the hill
  
• Cooking soup
  
• Cut grass smell
  
• Game nights at Melissa’s
  
• Writing slowly
  
• Sushi lunches
  

Once you have really emptied your thoughts onto paper (or screen) it is time to analyze what you brainstormed.  Look beyond the surface of what you have written (perhaps you wrote, I had many friends) and question each item individually (what types of friends did I have at the time? what was it I liked about having these friends? how did they add value to my life? how did this contribute to my happiness?). 

You may discover some interesting things about what brings you happiness!  For example, when I did this exercise I realized it was not just that I had many friends, but rather that I was interacting with interesting people who brought new perspectives to my life every day.  Maybe you will find that it was not your significant other themselves that brought you happiness, but that being in that relationship brought you a sense of purpose and love.  Perhaps you will discover that you miss your fraternity days not just because of the beer pong or the parties, but because you felt a sense of belonging with your brothers and every day was an adventure.

Feel free to take this exercise as deep as you would like.  Maybe it feels right to explore many periods of happiness in your life and find common themes.  This exercise can take as little as a few minutes or as long as you are up for.

Next time I will write about how we can use the results of this brainstorming session to impact our happiness now. For today, however, just enjoy being open to the process of remembering those periods in your life that gave you such fulfillment… and most importantly, be open to the idea that you can attain that same level of satisfaction and happiness in the future. 

Thoughts on Happiness

Today I was thinking about a conversation I had with my boyfriend a few months ago.  It all started with the question, “are you happy?”  As simple a question as it may seem, it is quite a loaded one.  “What do you mean?” I replied.  “Am I happy right at this very moment?  Am I generally happy?  Am I a happy person?” my retorts abounded.  But no matter how many clarifying questions we ask our answer is likely to remain the same.  If you are happy, you know it and you are ready to tell the world (and clap your hands) no matter how the question comes up.  If you’re not happy, you probably know it too, and it’s time for some change!

We are likely to agree that happiness is internal – that is to say happiness does not miraculously fill your soul when you acquire some shiny material possessions or lose that last five pounds.  Yes, buying a new toy or trimming our waistlines can certainly bring us short-term excitement, but true happiness is much more complicated than that.

Finding your happy

Because happiness is such a complex emotional state, I believe that each of us experiences happiness in a different way.  That is, my happy might be very different from your happy.  No matter our own unique definition, we each have a right to experience happiness each and every day. 

But how?  If being happy were easy there wouldn’t be so many of us roaming through life like zombies trying each fad diet, motivational tool, and super fudge brownie ice cream that comes our way in an attempt to ease our discontent. 

In my own quest for happiness I have made a recent discovery, and it aligns with an article entitled “On the folly of rewarding A while hoping for B”.  In the article, Steven Kerr proposes that the problem with many organizational systems is that we reward behaviors that are actually counterproductive to the results we seek.  In applying this concept to my own life, I realize that oftentimes I take actions I think will make me happy when, in reality, they make me miserable.  While I may be the only one who has experienced this phenomenon, I am sure there are others who are operating under the same circumstances.

A couple examples:  As a teenager I had issues with my body and fell into a cycle of looking into the mirror and critiquing everything I saw.  My hips were too wide, my nose too big, my butt too flabby… To combat what I saw I did everything from crash dieting to lose weight to spending countless hours at the gym to layering on makeup.  As I’ve aged I held onto the notion that I will be happy when I finally look in the mirror and am pleased with the image I see.

I also operate under the assumption that I will be happy when I achieve financial security.  As a college student my income is minimal and my expenses high, but I have continued to add to my savings $20 at a time.  However, putting away that money has meant missing out on one-time experiences with friends and waiting out many dull nights at home because sushi with the girls would have broken my budget for the week.

These two examples illustrate my own folly – thinking I will find happiness by doing things (changing my body and saving too stringently) that have never brought me happiness before.  While there is a time and place for each of the above practices in a healthy way (exercising and eating right and saving for goals by realigning your priorities), I had taken my actions to the extreme – and it got me anywhere but happy.

There are many other ways for this folly to manifest itself.  Perhaps you went to school for a degree that you expected to bring you security or practicality, but in reality you wound up in an unsatisfying job that the paycheck didn’t make up for. Maybe you sought to quell your inner uncertainties by joining a religious group based solely on promises of salvation without a vested interest or real commitment to the principles of the sect. You could be on a continuous quest for the final fix that will solve your problems - obsessively reading The Secret, going on a cupcake and lettuce diet, taking up therapeutic underwater basket weaving - but never achieve satisfaction and instead move on to the next "big thing".

What do you think? Have you encountered this conundrum? Do you find that the things you expect to bring you true happiness fall short? Tomorrow I'll explore one way to rediscover and attain happiness in our own unique way. 

Evening Stroll

I walked slowly home from the gym tonight, smiling for no particular reason. Maybe it was just post-run endorphins overriding any logical thought, or the gradually growing light at the end of the tunnel (only two more weeks of classes!) but whatever the catalyst I began to relax in a way I haven’t achieved in some time. My feet touched lightly upon the pavement despite my lead-dense backpack, swift and calculated but in no hurry.  The essence of blossoming lilac bushes sailed along the dark night breeze, filling my nose with delight and my lungs with sweet refreshment. Despite the sun’s long absence from the sky, the temperature stayed warm; instead of chilling the sweat on my neck, each lapping wave of wind gently cooled my skin and caressed my worry. 

Back in my apartment I’ve changed and showered, but the sense of wellbeing and pure content has not been stripped away with my soggy T-shirt or washed down the drain either. As my eyes grow heavy at the thought of this long day and those to come I’m overwhelmed with an unlikely emotion; gratitude. For once I can honestly say I am not annoyed or even angry at the thought of the work to be done or the meetings to attend. Instead, I feel lucky to have the opportunity to worry about my schoolwork and my intern projects at all. While I’m quite certain this feeling will pass at promptly 8:30 am tomorrow - just in time to finish my latest international economics homework assignment - I'm going to enjoy these last moments of unbridled calm while I still can.

Lazy Sunday: California Style

I had a great day spent with my favorite guy - but if I had to pick a second-best Sunday it would be California inspired, no doubt. A sushi lunch (outside but in the shade) paired with a fruity cocktail, bright strappy sandals, and an afternoon of conversation followed up with a stroll along the beach. 

Signature Accessories

To continue with yesterday’s theme of signature style, today I’m tackling signature accessories. I have talked about the importance of embracing a signature style that enables you to take advantage of any opportunity that comes your way, and this concept applies to our accessories as well. I’m not just talking about shoes and hair clips though – accessories also include the tools that make every day easier and help you complete even the most mundane tasks with a flourish.

Purse by Dooney and Burke

Bag: Your handbag, backpack, messenger bag or tote is the mother of all signature accessories, and a quality carryall is essential to holding the rest of your everyday tools. I prefer a bag with many pouches to keep all of my goodies organized and it has to be comfortable to carry – self-inflicted scoliosis or a sore neck are never a style statement. 

Cross ATX Pen info here

Pen: Never be without a pen in hand when it’s time to mark down an important phone number or address again. Whether you prefer an understated basic Bic or a full on Cross fountain - all that matters is it won’t let you down when you need to scrawl out a last minute meeting reminder.

 Waterbottle by Sigg

Water Bottle: Not only is it the greenest way to quench your thirst, carrying a bottle of water is a simple step to ensure you stay hydrated and fresh throughout the day. Plus, you’ll never have to pay $3 for a spur-of-the-moment (think choking on a wayward bit of lunch or sudden lightheadedness) plastic bottle of H2O again!

Camera by Sony

Camera: How often have you seen a sight too funny/crazy/bizarre/stunning for words but had no way to capture the visual to share with someone else? I experienced this just yesterday when I caught a baby fox sitting on the stairs of the international studies building looking so precarious. If only I’d had my camera!

Trail Mix via eHow

A Snack: It’s hard (if not nearly impossible) to be open to opportunities and adventures when your stomachs growling, your head’s aching, and your growing more agitated by the second. Keeping a snack or two on hand is the perfect way to stay energized and up for anything. Of course, a Twix bar will not suffice. Go for something with a healthy mix of protein and carbohydrates while keeping it as unprocessed as possible. 

Signature Style

Do you have a personal style so defined and consistent that it has become a signature style? My personal style has varied so much I have never settled on one look long enough to develop it into a signature style. However, after continually trying different pieces, fashions and color schemes there is one thing I have decided: whatever your signature style, the best styles are ready for anything. What I mean is that when your clothing and accessories enable you to act on a whim and take part in the world around us fully you will look and feel most terrific! 

There are too many times I have slipped on a cute pair of heels in the morning or an overly-tailored dress that look great in the mirror only to feel pained and inhibited by noon. Passing up the walk to grab lunch because my toes are blistering and itching to get out of a meeting because a waist dart is sitting just a bit too close on my hips suddenly doesn't seem worth it. So as much as I've cherished my 4 inch wedges, it is time for me to let go - while it they may be practical for some they no longer prepare me for what I like to do most (impulse strolls to the park for one). 

Is your style - signature or otherwise - preparing you for what you hope to do today? Do you feel empowered and ready for anything as you walk out the door? If your goal is to score a promotion at work or look stunning at a (seated) dinner party, then a dark tailored suit or mega heels may be the right choice for you. For the rest of us, think carefully before making style decisions solely on what you see on TV on in the latest Lucky magazine. Opt for flattering and practical pieces that can take you from early am to late evening in confidence and comfort and you are sure to look your best.

Tune in tomorrow for some more ideas about signature accessories that are ready for anything.

Artist Spotlight: Marc Johns

"The Mustaches Chased Him Zealously" 

For his sleek, understated drawings, clever concepts, and generally melancholy oddness, Marc Johns is absolutely my favorite illustrator. I'm a proud owner of this "Beard Bird" print (thanks to my wonderful boyfriend), and I hope to have at least a few more to keep him company in my next apartment. For now, here's a smattering of my favorite of Johns's drawings. Like what you see? You're in luck! A book of Marc's work, titled Serious Drawings, will be available starting May 15. Find more information on Amazon.com. 

All of the photos found here come from the Marc Johns website where you can check out all of his work (including post it note art), purchase your own print, or learn more about the man himself.

 "You Stole My Thunder But I Stole Your Lightning"

"This is a Reusable Cloth Bag"

"The Hovering Gentlemen's Club"

Transformation

Photo found here 

Change is about, but it’s not in the air. Okay, it may well be in the air too; but lately I have been too consumed with what is brewing inside me to notice any external shifts. From sudden clarifying thoughts to moments of renewed understanding, I have begun learning things about myself at a rapid rate and recognizing themes that have remained hidden until now. Can I be more specific? That I don’t know.

At moments it feels like waves of enlightenment, sometimes clearly connected to a discovery or an event while at other times the catalyst is completely unknown. I have found myself making decisions with more confidence and internalizing new possibilities with enthusiasm. Perhaps this inner metamorphosis is the result of my changing perspective on the future and acceptance of the uncertainty so prevalent in my life right now.

Whatever the cause, transformation is under way. It is both exciting and confusing. I feel more open to change than ever and ready to embrace the person I discover along the way. Regardless of the specifics, I am certain that good things are on the way - and I look forward to sharing them with you as they become more clear. 

Have you gone through a period of profound renewal before? How did it influence your path in life? Your relationships? Your sense of self? 

Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day! Never one for chintzy gifts, I opt to give my mother something a little more personal on this special day - poetry. While the final product is anything but award winning, it's my favorite way to say thank you for another year of support and love. So here you have it Mom. I love you!

For so many years I have cursed my genes,

For boobs that need lift by artificial means,

The neurotic streak and the Texas wide hips,

And white skin more blinding than a solar eclipse.

But her physical legacy is only just the start,

For my mother is the one who has given me my heart.

On endless cross-country trips she was the best backseat driver,

With a toiletries tool kit that would envy Macgyver,

She showed me how to travel in style - even at a campground,

And looks like a queen even when no one else is around,

These days she’s captain of her own “BREEZY1”,

The driver’s seat from which my father is shun(ed).

She understands the importance of a good education,

And for that reason she’s in school administration,

After so many years teaching she can’t simply let it go,

When at the chalkboard or reading chair she puts on quite a show,

And even though I’m way better at playing Five Crowns,

She still taught me the difference between verbs and nouns.

She passed on her grace, articulation, and gratitude,

But perhaps best of all she gave me her attitude,

Because on the worst of days she’s still able to smile,

And make it though tough situations with style,

She’s a like a straight Ellen or a fierce Beyonce,

(Even though she got the boot in ballet).

So this mother’s day I want everyone to know,

I have the best mother in the land, although,

She may have given me a crooked chin,

We’ve had more adventures than Huckleberry Finn,

And don’t think for a minute that I don’t see,

How lucky I am to have so much of my mom in me. 

Book Club: The End of Overeating

I am in the middle of the most interesting book: The End of Overeating; Taking Control of the Insatiable American Appetite, by former FDA commissioner David Kessler. Rarely do I buy books, especially one still only available in hardcover, but after seeing Kessler speak about his research on the Colbert Report (one of my most trusted news sources) I knew it would be worth it. So far the text has not disappointed. Kessler's research is centered around understanding why Americans overeat and the role that ingredient composition, the food industry, marketing, and sensory appeal play in this phenomenon. Given the outlandish obesity rates in the US and the obsession over food and weight so prevalent in our society, Kessler's writing could not be more relevant.  

One of the ideas Kessler presents is that of eating as entertainment - also called "eatertainment". The concept of eatertainment is certainly one embraced by the restaurant industry and the prepared food industry alike. The writing really got me to thinking about the role we often allow food to play in our lives. Coping mechanism. Indulgence. Reward. Distraction. Stress reliever. Sound familiar? It might seem obvious, but it was not until reading this book that I realized just how much we tend to use food to escape our circumstances rather than immerse ourselves in the moment - despite what our intentions may be.

Perhaps the best thing about Kessler's writing is his frank style and personal input. Even as a former FDA commissioner, he's not beyond admitting his own struggles to eat healthily given the thousands of processed temptations we are inundated with on a daily basis. I also find the dual approach to examining the obesity "epidemic", from both a chemical and psychological standpoint, a welcome refreshment from the countless one-sided commentaries and diet books on the market. You can find more information about Kessler's work on the FDA website. 

Best. Purchase. Ever.

Photo found here 

Yup - in addition to a new smoothie bottle I shelled out $4.99 for a sparkly blue and purple hula hoop. Impulse buy? Hardly. I have had my eye on a hoop or two for the last few weeks and in celebration of the end of my second to last midterms (it's a never ending celebration) I decided to take the plunge, and I'm so happy I did. Seriously, there is a reason these plastic rings are such a classic hit. It is impossible to frown and hoop - look stern in concentration, perhaps, but frown? Never.  Although, my hooping style is a bit different than the hip-swiveling ladies above (granted, the bubbling number on the right would make keeping the hoop from falling a snap). I think this ensemble is much more up my alley. 

Small Victory

One essay, one case, and one exam into the week and it’s finally time for some relaxation. I celebrated the end of my second-to-last midterms (a small victory, but a victory nonetheless) with a fresh coat of raspberry polish and a shiny new purchase – a bright green water bottle suitable for homemade smoothies.  Maybe I’m just justifying my desire to buy, but being able to make my own smoothies and not buying them in styrofoam cups from Jamba Juice - as good as they are - seems like the right choice for anyone trying to decrease their waste output. My favorite mix to fill it with? An all-fruit frozen cherry smoothie, straight from my little Magic Bullet blender. It's the perfect morning treat's that easy to digest and full of hydrating, nutrient rich juice. 

Uncertainty

This quote sums up so well my thoughts of today. While I can't say I've embraced uncertainty myself (okay - I've forged an all out war with the creature, planner in hand, attempting to schedule every minutiae of my future), I'm beginning to realize my attempts have been entirely in vain. It's time to make peace with uncertainty, or at least quit pretending I will one day seize control.

Lazy Sunday: Out to Sea

My Sunday has been anything but lazy, but while my hands have been busy typing case write-ups and my eyes scanning international economics review sheets - my mind has been out to sea all day. Combing the sand patiently for fragments of sea glass, perfectly smoothed by years of the ocean's rhythmic dance with the shore. Swaying gently with each wave's swell, lulling me into a contemplative state. Savoring each spray of salty refreshment, a welcome relief from the white heat of the sun intensified by the water's glassy reflection. In reality, it's back to offer curves and trade tariff theory. In my mind, my toes dig further into the warm sand - an anchor wedged deeply in a dream I refuse to leave behind.

Movie Night

A rainy day in Denver made for a perfect afternoon at the movie theater. What did we see? Wolverine of course! While neither my mother or I are much for action blockbusters, we both really enjoyed the film. Lots of surprises and heart pumping fight scenes from beginning to end kept my attention (which tends to quickly drift off sometime after the previews show) and peeks of a nude Hugh certainly added to the excitement!  

The best part of the flick? The credits! Along with a few other loyal viewers, my mother and I waited through the hundreds of names flying past the black screen quickly scanning the names for those fifteen familiar letters: Curtis Greenwood. I couldn't be more proud of my brother.

 

Lunch at Adams Mountain Cafe

I'm lucky enough to have my mom visiting this weekend and we just returned from an exciting day of sightseeing and traveling about. One of our highlights of the day was a wonderful lunch in Manitou Springs at the Adams Mountain Cafe.  I had the Senegalese Vegetables atop udon noodles smothered in a flavorful peanut ginger sauce, sprinkled with currants, toasted almonds, and scallions. Mom went for the Peak Sandwich, an open face turkey sandwich on sunflower seed bread, topped with sherry creme sauce, spinach and tomato, and white cheddar cheese.  

The Senegalese veggies were perfect, the snow peas and celery still crisp.

A note on our table, we loved the message.

The towering sandwich.